Understanding Trauma: Symptoms and Healing

Trauma is not just what happened to you, it’s the effect of what happened to you. Trauma can be from a single event or it can be a series of events such as childhood emotional or physical neglect and abuse or it can be from what we didn’t get enough of and needed from our caregivers such as affection, safety, attunement, validation, unconditional positive regard, healthy limits, etc. Those who are traumatized in their families of origin are likely to be triggered by their closest relationships and in their own home.

Below we discuss a few common symptoms of trauma and how to begin, or continue, healing.

Hypervigilance
After trauma, the body and brain can get stuck in hypervigilance - or in other words, our body and brain can get stuck constantly monitoring for danger which in turn keeps you feeling in danger and therefore, keeps your system overworking/over responsible for your safety long after the imminent danger has ended. The body and brain respond to current environments as if the danger is still there; this stimulates the sense of threat. Simply telling your trauma story will not change these somatic responses. 

Emotional Flashbacks

We don’t remember trauma the way we remember every other event in our lives. Instead of being stored as a narrative or story in the thinking part of our brain, trauma is stored in the emotional center of our system, the amygdala. This means trauma is often stored in feelings and sensations without words. When we experience a trigger in the present day, the thinking part of our brain shuts down and we get flooded by intense emotions and sensations. Our body is reliving the past over and over again. 

Dissociation

The ability to sever from the present moment and experiences is not just a symptom, it is a superpower. Dissociation helps athletes, musicians, artists, and every day people perform while suffering from illness, injury, loss, grief, anxiety, etc. It also helps us to act swiftly in high stress situations and have rapid access to information without distraction of our emotional experiences. In traumatic situations, this can be necessary for survival. However, after the trauma has ended or we have moved away from the traumatic people, the acute stress response of dissociation can be stuck in the “ON” position. You might experience this as a numbing, shutting down, and avoidance or as intrusive images, emotions, and body responses. 

Often trauma survivors, especially those who experienced trauma in their families of origin, learned to split, sever, or dissociate from the parts of them that experienced the trauma and the strong emotional experiences that go with the events of the past and the parts of their system that went on functioning to keep those other parts safe. These can be called the “keep on Keeping on” parts. We can feel torn between the old wounds/emotional flashbacks popping up and the gatekeepers of our everyday “keep on keeping on” parts.

There is a path forward.

Differentiating

It’s important to start differentiating between triggered feelings from the past and current “feelings” that are meant to help you assess your current situation accurately. One easy way to do this is to notice the sudden, intense, and slow to fade feelings; these are likely triggers. Current feelings tied to our present day tend to ebb and flow and build gradually to a peak. Triggered feelings tell us more about the past, while current feelings tell us more about our present moment.

Dual Attention

The next step is to develop the ability to notice two things at once. We must work on the ability to observe our triggered feelings and notice that we are not in danger anymore. Working on reminding ourselves that “this is a trigger, I am triggered, this is a feeling flashback, something bad isn’t happening right now” can help us and our somatic responses slow down. When we react to a triggered feeling like we are in danger, this will cause our bodies to become more activated and repeat the old patterns. It’s important to create new experiences during triggers. “Neurons that fire together, wire together” so in order to create new neural pathways, we need new experiences. Slowing down and noticing or observing what is happening is one way of creating a new experience.

Window of Tolerance

Our ability to tolerate emotional content is called our window of tolerance. Can I tolerate feeling fearful? Can I tolerate feeling anger, sadness, guilt? Do I jump to action, try to fix, manage, control? Do I shut down, numb, dissociate? Can I tolerate shame, tired, joy?

We develop a broader window of tolerance in a safe, secure attachment and a smaller window of tolerance in unsafe experiences and relational environments (trauma). Our window of tolerance is not fixed. We can increase our window of tolerance by having new experiences in safe, secure relationships. However, many who experience trauma in their families of origin do not feel safe to be attached to anyone or anything. If a relationship has never been safe, fear of separation or loss is likely to swing to mistrust and anger as closeness builds – noticing this and observing it is an important part of increasing your window of tolerance.

Self Energy

Internal Family Systems teaches us that within every system there are qualities that fall under Self energy. These can be described in the C’s or P’s of Self-energy:

C’s: Curiosity, compassion, calm, clarity, courage, confidence, creativity, and connection.

P’s: Persistence, Presence, Perspective, Playfulness, Patience

Trauma cannot damage our inherent Self-energy. Every system has a place within that holds the healthy parts that are capable of healing their wounded parts. Have you ever, even for just 10 seconds felt curious? Have you ever, even for just 10 seconds felt clarity? Is there a smell you like even if you just bring your attention and presence there for 10 seconds? Is there a color or item you like to look at even if you just bring your attention and presence there for 10 seconds? You can build Self-energy like you would a muscle. Start with 10 seconds and build up over time. You can pick just one of these qualities to develop more by noticing when you feel them. Presence, curiousity, and perspective are often the easiest qualities for trauma survivors to start with.

Closing Reflection Questions:

• Can you start to notice the survival parts of you? 

• Can you start to notice even if for just 20 seconds where that might have started in childhood? 

• Can you notice an old belief that your present experiences confirm about yourself? 

• Can you find even a small piece of information that challenges that belief? 

• Which quality of Self-energy would you like to work on building?

We believe everyone deserves to heal and has that innate ability wired in their system. If you’d like to continue with the help of a therapist from our team, we would be honored to support you. Please reach out to us by completing this form: CONTACT FORM.

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