Cultivating Calm: IFS Strategies for an Easier Holiday Season
The holiday season, a time often associated with joy, celebration, and togetherness, can also bring about stress and overwhelming emotions. For many, the pressures of social engagements, family dynamics, and the hustle and bustle of festivities can lead to heightened anxiety or triggers that challenge our sense of peace. However, amidst this whirlwind, there exists an approach—Internal Family Systems (IFS)—that offers insights and options for a more balanced holiday experience.
IFS, a therapeutic model developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz, explores the internal dynamics of the mind, viewing it as a system composed of various "parts." These parts encapsulate our emotions, beliefs, and experiences, shaping our responses to external stimuli. During the holidays, these parts can become particularly active, often leading to inner turmoil and external stress.
One of the fundamental principles of IFS involves acknowledging and understanding these parts without judgment, instead fostering compassion and harmony within oneself. Applying this concept during the holiday season can be transformational. Here's how:
Check-In with Your Inner Parts: Utilize the IFS concept of inner parts to identify and acknowledge parts of you that may carry emotions and reactions this holiday season. Utilize a guided meditation on apps such as YouTube or InsightTimer or do a simple journal prompt observing your thoughts, feelings, emotions - By checking in with these parts, you can better understand your needs and navigate holiday stress with greater self-awareness.
Self-Compassion Amidst Expectations: The holiday season sometimes comes with unrealistic expectations, both internal and external. IFS encourages us to acknowledge the parts that feel pressured to meet these expectations and offers tools to show self-compassion. For example, instead of criticizing ourselves for not meeting every demand, we can learn to appreciate the part of us that criticizes with the understanding this part hopes to help by criticizing, while also making contact with new ways of acknowledging our efforts and learning to set realistic boundaries.
Embracing Vulnerability: The holidays often reunite us with family or past experiences that might evoke old stored feelings, thought, and behavior patterns. IFS emphasizes creating a safe space for these vulnerable parts, allowing them to express themselves without fear of judgment. Maybe you do this by journaling, creating a voice memo on your phone, attending a support group, or calling a friend that can compassionately witness your experience. This practice can lead to healing and greater emotional resilience.
Healthy Communication: IFS encourages fostering an inner dialogue among our parts. When we apply this principle to ourselves, our outside interactions with loved ones can benefit. By actively listening and empathizing to ourselves and others, we can create an atmosphere of understanding and compassion, even amidst differing viewpoints or tensions.
Prioritizing Self-Care: Amidst the festive rush, self-care often takes a backseat. IFS emphasizes the importance of taking care of ourselves and understanding different parts of us may need different things. Whether it's setting aside time for relaxation, engaging in activities we enjoy, or seeking support when needed, prioritizing self-care becomes essential for a serene holiday experience.
Incorporating these IFS-based strategies into our holiday routines doesn’t mean eliminating all stressors, but it offers a roadmap for navigating them with grace and understanding. Cultivating calm amidst the chaos becomes a journey of self-discovery and healing.
As we embrace the holiday season, let us carry the essence of Internal Family Systems—acknowledging, understanding, and nurturing our internal parts—allowing us to savor the moments, cherish connections, and truly experience the joy of the season.
Remember, amidst the flurry of activities, it’s okay to pause, breathe, and listen to the whispers of your inner parts— those voices can guide you toward self-discovery, the joy that comes from within, and a more tranquil holiday season.
*Disclaimer: The information in this blog is provided for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health care nor a recommendation or endorsement for any particular treatment plan, organization, provider, professional service, or product. The information may change without notice. No claims, promises, or guarantees are made about the completeness, accuracy, currency, content or quality of information linked. You assume all responsibility and risk for any use of the information.
IFS EMDR Therapy Group is an outpatient therapy group founded by Morgan Levine. We specialize in helping adults struggling with the effects of living in dysfunctional systems move toward healing and wholeness. We provide therapy to address symptoms such as anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, grief, obsessive and compulsive thoughts and behaviors including but not limited to using work, perfectionism, substances, relationships, food, etc. We offer ongoing support as well as EMDR intensives; both of which are informed by IFS, EMDR, DBT, CBT, Polyvagal Theory, trauma-informed yoga, attachment, and other recovery principles. Our therapists work virtually with clients living throughout Maryland, Washington D.C., Virginia, Pennsylvania, Georgia, and Florida. Morgan Levine also provides trauma-informed consultation to therapists worldwide. Connect with us through our website at https://ifsemdrtherapy.com/contact-us.
